Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Oh NO She Didn't!

Look at this kid -doesn't she look so sweet and innocent? Well, she used to be, at least.
I've noticed an increase in sass and attitude from Lauren since preschool started. It's like she's decided that she's big now and gets to say things to me like "but I want it", and "you said no to me, you don't say no to me", and always seems so surprised that phrases like that don't get her desired outcome.

Yesterday I even caught her throwing some of her sass her friend's way while we were coming home from preschool. After we dropped Sage off, we had a long conversation about how we don't talk to friends that way, and if you aren't nice to your friends then maybe your friends won't want to play with you anymore.

The afternoon went on, and the babysitter, Jessie, came over while I worked. She couldn't get Lauren to go down for her nap easily. Lo was crying about wanting to walk up the stairs, because about 30 minutes earlier she had thrown a fit about taking a nap, and I carried her up them. She's really weird about stuff like that - she was all worked up about wanting to walk up the stairs. I know, the kid is crazy. So after trying to get her off the subject for 5 minutes, I finally told her she could get out and go walk up the stairs. (And yes, that fixes the problem. There have been numerous times I've had to take her back outside to walk up the stairs in the garage, take a cup out of the sink for her to put in the sink. It sucks, but you just CAN'T get her to change her mind about it.)

And then it happened.

I was walking down the hall behind her and she turned around and stuck her tongue out at me.

I about went through the roof.

Where did she learn that? I'm assuming preschool. I know she's going to learn crap like this someday, but I'm not ready for that day. Is this whole attitude thing common when your kid starts going to school? She was just starting to get really sweet. We have pretty much stopped the throw-yourself-on-the-floor temper tantrums that lasted hours. She's old enough to reason, and to talk about things, and work things out before they escalate to that point.

But sticking her tongue out at me?

So I whipped her around and asked her if she just stuck her tongue out at me.

She said yes.

I then told her that we don't do that and if she EVER did that again she would not like what happened. (Really, I hadn't decided what the punishment would be at that point. New territory here.)

I think I had the crazy "pushed the wrong button" eyes, because the babysitter looked slightly frightened. But we laughed about it a minute later, so I'm pretty sure she doesn't think I'm too crazy.

Seriously, I'm not ready for this kind of stuff.

I guess as always, every new stage of your kid's life brings a whole new set of challenges.

Now I need to think of the punishment, because how much you wanna bet I see that tongue again in the next couple of days?


Kristy said...

Have you read the book "Scream Free Parenting" by Hal Runkel? Very good about discipline!! It just helps put it all into a different perspective. I'm nervous about the discipline stuff. Our lil' ham is already throwing some tantrums and it's so new, I don't know what to do! But that book is really good and will help!

Lindsay said...

Cut it off! Haha! I'm kidding. They learn sass like it's the whole point of preschool. I walked into Brooklyn's classroom yesterday and she was yelling at the boy next to her, "Helloooooo! You're on MY mat! Get off!" (a proud moment? no.)

I just talk to her a LOT about it right now but I feel a lot the way you do. Madness.

Deanna said...

My mother (yes, your sweet grandma) used pepper on tongues that stuck out when they shouldn't or said bad words...

Jennie said...

Kids are so embarrassing. I love the "crazy mom" eyes you were talking about. I get those, too and my kids freak out and say, "Mom! You're scaring me!" At least they don't come out TOO often, right? Someone told me at a baby shower for my first child not to worry about anything your kid does because it's just a phase. I have to remind myself of that...often...

Ashley Bennion said...

I haven't personally been in this territory with mine but have heard that Parenting with Love and Logic is a good book - I bought it but haven't read it yet - Better get started :) at least before preschool starts in a couple years.

The Byers Family said...

We didn't have a problem with the tongue, or if we did I'm sure I told them I'd cut it off and they were sure I would so I never saw it again ;)

I did have the "I hate you" when Annie was 5ish and I very gently took her arm, turned her little body towards her bedroom and told her I was so sorry to hear that because I loved her so much but she couldn't live with a family SHE didn't love so pack you bags and go find that "better" mommy and daddy. Of course she bawled her eyes out and said "sorry sorry I love you!" and luckily she stayed. I haven't heard that little I hate you phrase since. Now, if she had gone to her room and started packing (Clothes only of course, I told her the toys stayed with the loving family) I don't know what I would have done!

Good luck with Lo, you have to find whatever discipline method works best for HER. If it's time out, taking privledges away, a swat on the butt, whatever. But it may also be slightly different from what you'll have to do with B (and YES B will go through this stuff too! she might even be a little sneakier at it after watching what Lo goes thru) I wouldn't ignore the problem though, then it'll just get worse.

Good Luck!